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You could say I’ve seen a lot. When my brother picked me up in ‘92, I wagged my tail ‘cause I smelled bacon on him and knew he was a softy. It worked. Since then I’ve eaten like a queen and have been given his favorite pajamas and tended to at every hour by my sister. I’ve had to defend my turf more than once. This other Weiner dog thought it was cool to bark at me on my street, so I had to stand my ground. It cost me half an ear, but it was worth it. Now I’m blind, but back in the day I took full advantage of my senses. My hip was dislocated when a car ran over me, but I’m totally over that. I sleep all the time and get carried everywhere anyway. I’ve had a fantastic life (my sis says I’m a “little warrior”), but if it’s all the same to you, I’m going to bed now.
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