Remembering Abinta Kabir

(From left) Emory students Kako Yamada, Abinta Kabir, Kyla Wickens, Asmita Gathoo and Camilla Gallin posing for a picture at their Fall Formal.

Buzz summer intern Mackenzie Ward is a rising sophomore at the Oxford College of Emory University and a graduate of Bellaire High School. 

On Saturday morning, I checked my phone before heading to work. I noticed a message from my roommate in our college soccer group text message asking if everyone was okay, as she had “just found out.” It seemed random and strange as I saw no previous messages. So I quickly called my friend to ask what was going on, expecting her to discuss the “heartbreaking” news from some reality show or something along those lines. I wish that was all she had had to say.

My roommate explained what little she knew: Our friend from Emory, Abinta Kabir, had been one of many held hostage and murdered in Dhaka, Bangladesh. She was enjoying a meal with a student from UC Berkeley and another Emory student at a famous little café close to the embassies. Each of them had come to Bangladesh for internships or to visit family. The shock of this news was indescribable. 

Before tragic news directly affected me, I had witnessed a few close calls that were enough to have me shaken up. A few weeks ago, one of my close friends from high school was traveling home from a month abroad with her family. It turns out she had been at the Instanbul Airport exactly 24 hours before the bombing happened. When she told us what happened, and how shocked she felt, I was left with the numbing image of what it would have been like to lose such a good friend so suddenly, if her family had chosen to fly home just a day later. 

And nearly a month ago, the Orlando shooting at Pulse nightclub occurred, targeting the gay community there. That news hit a little harder for me because my family hosted a foreign exchange student, who became like a brother to me, and he came out during his year staying with us. While he is now back in Brazil, the thought of losing him really hit home for me. To accentuate the heartache, a friend of mine from Tampa reached out to me, divulging her fear that her brother could have gone into Orlando to that very club that night. The chances felt too real to her as well. 

And then, this past weekend, when I heard about Abinta, the news became even more personal. I have been thinking about how many people read about international news but many may not imagine that tragic news abroad will directly affect their lives. Often, I stop scrolling through Facebook when I see such horrible headlines, and I imagine others do the same. It takes me a moment to process what senseless violence has yet again hurt so many people, and my throat feels tight imagining the grief that people – even though they’re strangers -  are feeling and will continue to feel. 

However, now that such violence has struck MY college, a friend who lived in MY building, the feeling of helpless defeat strikes an entirely different level. Suddenly the bad news won’t eventually fade with the next news cycle, but will remain as a constant reminder of innocent lives lost unjustly.

I continue to think about all of the lives that have been touched by the people we have lost and the unending grief forced upon us. Family, best friends, classmates, co-workers, partners – the loss all of these relationships left to mourn. Realizing I will never have the chance to know Abinta more than I had the honor to is heartbreaking. Realizing thousands of people will never be impacted by her character, touched by her brightness is even more annihilating. And realizing her closest friends and family are aching even more than I am is the most devastating reality to face. 

Abinta was one of 22 people whose lives were so unfairly ended long before it should have, and the Dhaka tragedy is one of many that leaves us numb and mournful. Thinking of Abinta and Faraaz Hossain, another Emory student that I never had the chance to know personally, we should remember our lost ones for who they were, not what happened to them. Holding Dhaka and the families and friends of Abinta and all those lost, we offer hope to one another for a clearer future of peace and safety.

If you would like to recognize and pay tribute to those who lost their lives in Dhaka, there will be a Prayer Vigil at the Bangladesh-American Center in Houston on Saturday, July 9 at 12 p.m. There will also be a livestream feed of the gathering in Atlanta on Thursday, July 7, at 12 p.m.

I offer my prayers and condolences to Abinta’s family and to everyone affected by this tragedy.