What do we miss?

In most every situation, there is a silver lining. Something to look forward to, something to take joy in, a lesson to be learned. 

This story began with a phone conversation I had with a friend during our stay-at-home days, lamenting our gray hair and the never-ending cycles of the dishwasher. At one point, our talk turned to what we were missing most: Was it seeing friends’ faces? Being comfortable in the same room as our parents? Dinners out?

We wondered what everyone else was missing about the olden days, the ones back in February. So we asked, and, yes, much of our old normal was missed. But surprisingly – and here’s where the silver lining comes in – we learned a lot. About ourselves, and about what really matters. Here is what we heard.

“I went to Target yesterday for the first time in six-plus weeks. It was awesome. What should I be looking forward to? A vaccine.” – Tracy Kapiloff

“I am 60 years old, and my mother told me that women friends will matter more when you get older. It’s really true. Even if it’s inconvenient, I’m going to connect with my friends that matter to me. Not just convenient friends. And … I can’t wait to have dinner parties.” – Tina Pyne

“I am loving quarantine! I’m going to miss more things than I am looking forward to. I love spontaneous workouts in the backyard as a family, I love everyone being home for dinner, I love not needing a manicure or brushing my hair!” – Peta Rubenstein

“Besides the obvious – going to a grocery store and not feeling anxious and rushed, going to the gym, seeing friends, travel, kids back at school, visiting the hair colorist and manicurist – what I am really looking forward to is being able to be around people and not be anxious about whether I am too close, or in danger, or putting them in danger.” – Anonymous

“I should be looking forward to full days at the office. I really just want to travel!” – Wendy Burgower

“I am looking forward to not seeing myself on Zoom or Teams or any other video-based platform. Seriously, could anything be less flattering? I should be looking forward to taking a trip with my family, but honestly, I really want to go back to the [Episcopal High School] campus. I miss my co-workers, the energy of the students, the beauty of the Trinity Courtyard, and the view of the front lawn from my office window.” – Peggy Haney

“Hugging my friends and family and sitting comfortably inside their houses. And using their bathrooms and silverware!” – Amy Krasner

“My mom! My mom is 80, and I have been going weekly to drop off groceries and medicines. I sit outside her door, 20 to 25 feet away. I want to kiss her! I want to hug her! I want her to be able to go to the beauty shop again like she did every Friday! We will be fine, our kids will be fine. But my mom, it’s hard.” – Sarah Gibbs

“Non-socially-distanced sex.” – Buddy Herz

“I love being isolated! I’m cooking, needlepointing, reading and relaxing. Who knew? It will be interesting to see what things defined as normal will actually be worth going back to.” – Nancy Beck

“I look forward to meeting friends and enjoying a meal out with them.” – Stuart Hudson

“I might be crazy, but I'm not too upset by the quarantine. My nest is full – those days are numbered, so I'm grateful to have my kids at home. Don't get me wrong, I'm missing in-person time with friends and family, but I'm more worried about what happens next: the uncertainty of the health risks, the lack of firm calendar commitments. Of course, too many in our community are feeling the real financial impact that won't disappear when the quarantine is lifted. So I guess I am crazy.” – Nicole Gibson

“I am ready for my college son to be able to work out and do things out of the house. He’s stir crazy.” – Denise Rashti

“Simple. Going out to eat.” – Bernie Milstein

“I am really enjoying having my four kids at home. I’m not sure they are enjoying it quite so much. I never want to change this little bubble that I'm living in and [wish I could] somehow keep the news from them that stay-at-home orders have been lifted and just keep living this way for years.” – Anonymous Dad