Sunday Dinners: Connecting at the table

Sunday dinner was always a given when I was growing up in Galveston. Whatever the season, my parents, sister, and I would gather with our grandparents, aunts and uncles, and cousins – all from my mom’s side because my dad grew up in New Jersey, except for Grandma Helen and her Aunt Fannie who both moved to Texas to be close to us. One of my mom’s brothers was a Texas politician, so that dictated much of the grown-ups’ conversation, and there were always extras – family friends or cousins’ girlfriends.

The menu, like the core company, was pretty steady: take-out barbecue or fried chicken, iceberg lettuce salad with La Martinique True French Vinaigrette dressing, and my Aunt Marilyn’s bubbly-cheesy hominy or her mac and cheese topped with oleo (a.k.a. margarine) and Ritz cracker crumbs.

Diana Brackman, whose grandchildren are now young teenagers, remembers her own family’s Sunday dinners as “command performances” that they all looked forward to. “Mother was the baby of nine,” she says. “She never wore plaid clothes because all of her clothes were hand-me-downs from her sisters, and they were always wearing plaid.

“There are several years of age difference between the cousins, but, because of those [Sunday] dinners, all of the cousins are extremely close,” Diana says. “I am very grateful to my mother for creating this family tradition.” On their menu: Luby’s.

Tina Pyne, always the consummate hostess, says her favorite Sunday tradition is family dinner. “I’ll cook a big pot of gumbo or a big pot of chili, somebody typically makes a cake or some crazy dessert that they saw on TikTok, and we have a family dinner,” she says, adding, “Any strays around town are always welcome.”

Studies show that children lack guidance from older adults because of limited opportunities for “meaningful exchange.” That pattern, studies say, is linked to a decline in life satisfaction among older people and an increase in negative stereotypes toward the aging among younger people. 

In response to that growing divide, Penn State’s Intergenerational Program studies the impact of cross-generational activities on people of all ages. “Younger and older people have skills and talents that can help mutually address each other’s needs and aspirations,” the program’s literature explains. “Participants [in intergenerational programs] become less susceptible to negative age-based stereotypes, derive richer life perspectives, learn new skills, [and] expand their social support networks.” The National Institutes of Health says intergenerational gatherings are also good for our health – older people benefit in the forms of improved self-esteem and depression. 

Maybe the answer is as simple as Sunday dinner.

We’ve all heard about the general benefits of family dinners: kids who eat with their families have more extensive vocabularies, better grades, higher resilience, better self-esteem, lower rates of drug and alcohol abuse, less instance of depression, and less tendencies toward eating disorders. (For more on the benefits of family dinner and for ideas on how to implement them, including timely conversation starters and menu ideas, check out The Family Dinner Project, a program based in Boston at Massachusetts General Hospital’s Psychiatry Academy, at thefamilydinnerproject.org.)

But something about Sunday dinner is special. Even The Emily Post Institute advocates “bringing multiple generations of friends and family together around the table,” especially on Sunday evenings. Practically, “Sunday night is a ‘school night,’ [so] an afternoon or early evening meal covers both lunch and dinner and lets everyone get home in time to prepare for the upcoming week.”

As I think back to our Galveston Sunday dinners a lifetime ago, what I remember most is the feeling of being at home, ours or my Aunt Marilyn’s, surrounded by family. Just picturing that hominy brings it all back.

Aunt Marilyn’s Hominy 

1 tablespoon olive oil
½ large yellow onion, chopped
1 green bell pepper, chopped
1 15-ounce can yellow hominy, drained and rinsed
1 15-ounce can white hominy, drained and rinsed
1 15-ounce can red enchilada sauce (we like Hatch medium-hot)
2 cups shredded cheddar cheese

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees and spray a 9-by-13-inch baking dish (or equivalent) with nonstick cooking spray. Heat the oil over medium heat in a large skillet. Add the onion and bell pepper, and cook until they are soft and translucent, about 8 to 10 minutes. Stir in the hominy and then the enchilada sauce. Simmer for 10 minutes. 

Pour the hominy mixture into the baking dish. Top with the cheddar cheese. Bake for 25 minutes. Turn on the broiler and cook for another 4 minutes or so, until the cheese bubbles and browns. Let the hominy rest for 10 minutes before serving.